Theresa's Mixed Nuts: It's Not About The Wedding...

Friday, May 18, 2012

It's Not About The Wedding...

Most little girls dream of their wedding day. I was no exception. I always had that Cinderella fantasy wedding in mind. I think my family had that in mind for me as well. From the minute we got engaged the pressure was on. It was expected to be perfect, and day by day the guest list was growing, as was the stress of the planning. I was now a stay at home mom after quitting my full time job, with benefits. It was taking longer than planned to save for this perfect wedding. Then a blessing happened. I became pregnant with our second child and I had no insurance. 
 
“We need to get married asap!” I told Jason. We were nowhere near ready for the elaborate wedding everyone was anticipating, but I needed insurance.

The next morning I woke up and called the Justice of the Peace.

“We can marry you today if you get here before 4:00” they said.

I called Jason and shared the news. Then it was set. He would leave work and we were getting married right now. With only our mothers and my grandmother in attendance we took our vows that day. There was no fancy dress, hundreds of flowers, or wedding guests. No big reception or cake that could pass off as artwork.

I’ve attended quite a few weddings since then. I’ve watched down to earth women turn into bridezillas, people spending thousands of dollars on a wedding, yet can’t afford a down payment on a house, and even though my best friend had one heck of a beautiful wedding, she admitted that it went by so quick, she doesn’t remember much about it. Thinking back now, my wedding may not have been ideal or fit the mold of others ideal weddings, but it couldn’t have been more perfect for me.

We’ve had many ups and downs through our marriage, but at the end of the day I feel so blessed to know that no matter what, I’ve got my husband by my side. He’s seen me at my best and at my worst and still stands beside me every day defending me, honoring me, and loving me. Tomorrow will be our 9 year wedding anniversary. A fairytale wedding wouldn’t have added any more sparkle or love to our lives. After all, it’s not about the wedding, it’s the marriage that counts. And I’ve had one fabulous ride on it so far!







15 comments:

  1. Oh that almost made me cry! I love your story! And I love your photos too. You certainly make a cute couple. Happy Anniversary to you both :)

    Paula
    lifeasweknowitbypaula.blogspot.com

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  2. AWWWW!! This is such a sweet post! Congrats tomorrow on 9 years!! Wow, that's awesome! You are so much like me when it comes to weddings. I had mine planned out in my head, and then we wound up just going to a little chapel with my parents there and got married one day. I've always said, a wedding isn't about anyone else but the two of you and your commitment to each other. Some people have weddings just to entertain their guests. We wanted it stress-free and to use our money towards other things. Like you said, an elaborate wedding day makes no difference in your future together and love for one another :)

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    1. Beautifully put Brandi! I think in my situation it was the guests that expected to be entertained, and it caused a lot of hurt feelings when we did it the way we did. But like you said, it's not about them, and frankly, I'd do it the exact same way again, even if a pregnancy didn't speed it along lol.

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  3. I sort of envy you for not having to go through the stress of a big wedding. Don't get me wrong, my wedding was beautiful, but it was expensive, stressful and yes, it flew by! I was all in favor of just doing something simple or going away to get married but my husband wouldn't hear of it! In the end he couldn't live without the big wedding and I could live with it so he got his dream wedding!

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    1. I actually find it sweet that your husband wanted the big wedding. I have a feeling he is a big romantic, which makes you a very lucky girl :)

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  4. I had the big wedding and I don't remember much of it. It was very expensive and definitely the money could've been better used elsewhere. Congratulations on your anniversary :)

    Found your blog through a FF blog hop, I think. Following you.

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    1. Thanks for stopping by! I'm following you back :)

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  5. Aww, you are so right. I got married at a courthouse too and it was still one of the best days ever. :)

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    1. By the way, Happy Anniversary!!

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    2. Thanks Camille! Hope you are feeling better today!

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  6. That was a rock n roll marriage and I wished I could have done it simply like that...seriously, the traditions for wedding in my family or Indonesian in general is really...really elaborately complicated!... Btw, happy anniversary dear! So happy for you :)

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    1. I actually think the Indonesian weddings are so beautiful and colorful! They seem like a lot of fun too!

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  7. that is exactly what happened to my brother and sister in law! just a few of the family members and that was it! i am no where close to being married...but i also do not think about my wedding or have it planned yet...LoL so i guess ill decide which way i will do it when that time comes!



    http://infinitelifefitness.com
    http://mscomposure.blogspot.com

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    1. Big wedding or small, as long as you are happy with the outcome, that's all that matters :) Just don't let anyone pressure you to fit their ideal wedding and I'm sure you will be happy either way. I think you will make a lovely bride!

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Thanks for your comments! I appreciate every one of them :)

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